The guy who *really* likes spreadsheets. "I went on a four-hour (FOUR-HOUR) Tinder date with a match who proceeded to walk me through the intricacies of Excel. Every day he charted his · Tap to play GIF. Fox. 3. Submitted by Danica Maxwell (Facebook) I had an online dating app for exactly one day because the first person to message me sent me a long, · Here are 21 of the worst: 1. "In the cool night air, with only my date's car shielding me from the freeway, I had to relieve myself to end my gastrointestinal torture." "I got sick from ... read more
I think he meant it as a compliment, but the 2nd part was all I heard. So I'm on the site just messaging a few random girls and start talking to this girl that seemed pretty nice. During the dinner I not only found out she only just turned 20 which really isn't that big of a deal but she was also the daughter of one of the Chiefs on my ship.
It had never been mentioned she had kids, even after I specifically asked. Just looking for a free meal. Do you know anyone with an online dating story to top these? Please SHARE with family and friends on Facebook! Martha Stewart Posts Nude From , Reminding Us All That She's Queen Of The Thirst Trap.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content.
The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff. Got a few hits back. No problem. Around the Web. This Video Will Soon Be Banned. Watch Before It's Deleted Secrets Revealed. Try Not to Gasp at David Schwimmer's New Plastic Surgery Pics popcornews. So the next time you go on a seriously awful date you'll know that you're not alone. We're right here with you. Every day he charted his height, weight, what he ate that day, what he weighed, what he read, watched, who he talked to, etc.
When I found him on Facebook later that night—after we hooked up—I realized he was cheating on his girlfriend with me. Not OK! One of my matches, let's call him Alex, seemed nice and helpful—but I never actually met up with him in person. A year later, I get a call from Alex, asking if he can travel cross-country to visit me, stay in my house, and meet my parents. Um, no? Which one is it? I was mortified, so I blocked them—it was the first thing I could think to do. I was a few beers and a couple hours in when I decided to call it a night.
The guy judged me for yawning and put two more beers in front of me—then he guilt-tripped me for 'making him come out of his way to meet for such a short date. That was his opening line. I'm sorry, but implying I'm a prostitute is going to get you nowhere.
I thought that was super weird and didn't want to, but he kept asking so I finally told him. Then he made a big deal about telling me his, which was 50 points higher. OK, cool, whatever. What the heck is this guy doing?? I walk around the corner to make eye contact with Dude who is in a squatting position over my toilet, with a stick, poking around in murky brown poop water that is millimeters from overflowing onto my bathroom floor.
Horrified, he yells, 'Stop looking at me! Go back to bed! I have it under control! I don't know what else to do. He yells, 'Why don't you have a plunger?!? He tells me to go back to bed he has it under control I remember hearing him peek in my room a bit later and heard, 'I fixed it. I hesitantly approach my toilet to find the water is down.
But there is something poking out from the bottom of the toilet like he didn't get it all. Upon further inspection, what I was seeing was the tip of a stick. Some gloves, towels and BBQ tongues later I pulled out approximately 3 foot of stick from my toilet that had broke off, followed by several other stick fragments.
Dude had broke several sticks. I heard my door open and close so much, because he was going outside to look for a stick, one would break, he'd go get another. Dude had left drippy poop water stains all over my bathroom floor. After work that day, I went straight to the store and bought a plunger.
From amijohnsnow : "A chick said she was having a 'work party' at her house and I should come over. Went to her place and noticed more than half of the people were younger , while I was 21 and the girl was also Then they gathered everyone in the living room and proceed to talk about the job.
Turns out it was one of those pyramid scheme recruiting gatherings. I just sat there drinking my beer only one drinking for 2 hours because I thought it was rude to leave because they were telling sob stories and saying how much this 'job' had helped them.
Sat there listening to some 'head of the group guy' saying how we can make millions in a short amount of time. Saying bullshit like, 'You see my BMW 3 Series out front? Never went to 'work parties' for a Tinder date again.
We had a pretty good connection so we decided to have dinner as well. After having a few drinks one thing lead to another and ended up back at my place, we hooked up and went to sleep. I asked her if everything is alright, she said yes and got back into bed I thought, little creepy, but probably nothing to worry abou t. At the time, I was like, damn, I must just be a stallion.
From coyoteaparty : "Went on a date after talking to this guy for a few weeks and I told him I was thinking of getting my nose pierced but was afraid it would hurt. We are walking through a park in broad daylight and this dude takes a safety pin out of his pocket and fucking jams it through his nostril.
Blood pours down his face. He laughs and says, 'See? No big deal. From whcaepeachy : "Talked to him for two weeks before we went out and no red flags so we ended up going out to dinner. I said I hadn't been out in a while because I was trying to save money for a washer and dryer. He told me instead of saving for that I should save for a boob job.
Anyone who has ever used a dating app should know that the odds of actually having a good date are fairly slim. In fact, being on a dating app for a long time more or less guarantees that, at some point, you will have a truly awful date.
Or, in some cases, a truly horrifying date. In a recent Reddit thread, people shared their dating horror stories. And although none of them are bad enough to scare you off from dating for life, they'll make you thankful for all of the good dates you've been on. He was like, 'it feels really warm in my underwear for some reason. He ran into the bathroom and said he'd be free balling the rest of the night.
It was like pulling teeth to talk with him. I try to talk about travel — 'I don't see why anyone would ever want to leave the US. So I tell him about how my brother just purchased an Aston Martin. I really only like Camaros. but really, all I said was that I drove a Camaro from age Then, to top in off, he starts talking about No Fap and how he tried that but it just made him angry, so he followed strict ' masturbate once every three days' policy.
He said it gave him sizeable loads without affecting his mood. I jokingly ask if he masturbated today. He says yes. I ask if he washed his hands.
He hesitates. I smile and say bye, leaving his hand hanging out there. By the time I get home, he has deleted me from Tinder. I had to wake this kid up at noon and be like OK, I have to get ready for work, you need to leave. So he started to get dressed and couldn't find one sock. HE ACCUSED ME OF STEALING IT.
He searched through all my drawers and dumped out my dirty clothes hamper looking for it. I ended up finding it weeks later in my sock drawer.
I kind of think he planted it there, but I'm not sure why. So he finally starts to leave and HIS CAR GOT TOWED because he parked exactly where I told him not to. Looking back now I would've told him tough s, got him an Uber and went to work. But I took him to the car tow place so he could get it back. And of course he doesn't have his wallet. So I had to pay for it, and sign for it because he doesn't have an ID on him.
BUT the car tow place DOESN'T TAKE CARDS so we had to go find an ATM to get cash. So he finally gets his car, I'm already like 30 minutes late to work, and he goes, 'Okay I'll call you later' and I just said 'Never talk to me again. He texted a few hours later and said he lost the stylus for his phone. I blocked his number. Second date, he drove and then drank a LOT, seemingly on purpose so he wouldn't be able to drive home. I agreed, and he spent the whole night crying in my bed about how I was going to leave him.
I broke it off, he then looked up a performance I was in later that year in college and showed up. When the show ended, he waited around to say hi like friends and family do and then interrupted me while I greeted people to say 'SO THAT'S WHY YOU'VE BEEN SO BUSY' and then stormed out. He drove 35 minutes, and sat through a minute play, for that. Place was filled with empty beer cans. Four, I kid you not, four rusty, hair-filled razors in the shower all were his — he lived alone.
The sink was coated in hair and toothpaste. I was so disturbed. Then he told me he had a suspended license and a kid he never met, and I high-tailed it home. He comments on me ordering pizza in an Italian restaurant. I don't often eat meat, only veggie thing was pizza. He comments on me eating pizza with knife and fork. He comments on me not wearing enough make-up only mascara, even though I wore zero make-up in profile pics.
I politely ask about his work. He explains what he does as if he's talking to a 4 year old, even though he knows I'm doing two master degrees and did Biology at my finals. Throughout the date [he] kept explaining stuff to me as if I'm in kindergarten. Doesn't ask anything about me but long monologues about himself. I decline getting another drink and leave. Dodge his kiss and give him a peck on the cheek instead. On my way home I get a text asking if I'm sure I don't want a kiss.
It was a 12 minute-long video about his MLM [multi-level marketing] vacation club that was 'totally not a pyramid scheme. Then he proceeded to explain why he was right about this and why it's not offensive when I told him that I did not appreciate his statement.
Then he told me about his years of psychological and physical abuse by his father, eventually culminating in him being stabbed by his father. He also suggested I listen to a couple of his favorite podcasts by a Trump-supporting, feminist-hating misogynist. On the way home I gave him a ride because it was cold out and I'm apparently a bleeding heart he asked me if I would go on a hour road trip that weekend with him which would have been our second date by the way.
Hard no. were you on the date we just had? When I stopped seeing him due to his clinginess and political leanings , his friends at work were apparently upset with my decision and one of them began to spread rumors that I'm sleeping with all my male friends.
One of those friends has a long-term girlfriend, and she caught wind of these rumors. It almost destroyed their relationship. We went to a bar for some drinks. We seem to be really hitting it off. Then her boyfriend turns up. It turns out he wants to have a MFF threesome and they had a Tinder account for her in order to find someone. When I got annoyed by this, they both suddenly got really aggressive and pissy. They followed me out of the bar and tried to get into a taxi with me. He refused to take off his coat and awkwardly started swearing.
He would ask me to come back to his place each time I finished a sip of my drink. The next day I told him I wasn't interested in seeing him anymore, then he asked me for a refund of the drink I offered to pay for but he insisted on buying.
Sign up here to get INSIDER's favorite stories straight to your inbox. Keep reading. HOMEPAGE 0. Sara Hendricks. Facebook Icon The letter F. Email icon An envelope. It indicates the ability to send an email. Share icon An curved arrow pointing right. Facebook Email icon An envelope. Email Twitter icon A stylized bird with an open mouth, tweeting.
Twitter Snapchat icon A ghost. Snapchat Fliboard icon A stylized letter F. Flipboard Pinterest icon The letter "P" styled to look like a thumbtack pin. Pinterest Link icon An image of a chain link. It symobilizes a website link url. Copy Link. He leaned in for a kiss and pooped his pants. He probably had filthy hands. He didn't know when to leave. He couldn't let anything go. His apartment was filled with blood-stained pillowcases.
He mansplained. He tried to recruit his date to a pyramid scheme.
· Here are 21 of the worst: 1. "In the cool night air, with only my date's car shielding me from the freeway, I had to relieve myself to end my gastrointestinal torture." "I got sick from The guy who *really* likes spreadsheets. "I went on a four-hour (FOUR-HOUR) Tinder date with a match who proceeded to walk me through the intricacies of Excel. Every day he charted his · Tap to play GIF. Fox. 3. Submitted by Danica Maxwell (Facebook) I had an online dating app for exactly one day because the first person to message me sent me a long, ... read more
I would have loved to have drank your blood myself but had the feeling I would be full but only with self-pity. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. I can't do this. Twitter Snapchat icon A ghost. Keep the past in the past. It was very disappointing.Now online dating horror stories scary be real, the dating world is a jungle and sometimes it may feel like every guy has the potential to go crazy. Get our newsletter every Friday! On our first date. The beginning of the date was going well; until we ordered a few drinks and I proceed to spend the entire 2 hours talking about my ex and venting to this poor girl. Approximately six months later, I received a message from his Yahoo account that roughly said the following: "Hi! This guy sent me this message on Tinder: "pizza and anal?